A Guide to Instilling Discipline and Hard Work in Children
In today’s fast-paced world, instilling discipline and a strong work ethic in children is a crucial endeavor. As a seasoned chess coach, I, AGM Chandrajeet Rajawat, have had the privilege of mentoring numerous young talents, including International and National medal winners. Even many of them couldn’t be fully disciplined and follow a routine. Hence, I understand the significance and power of routine, discipline, and hard work in achieving success. In this article, we will explore science-backed strategies to encourage children to follow routines and develop habits that lead to success. Drawing inspiration from renowned experts in psychology and neuroscience, we’ll delve into the biology behind routine formation and provide practical tips for parents.
The Science of Routine Formation:
1. Insights from Leading Experts:
Prominent figures in psychology and neuroscience, such as Daniel Kahneman, renowned for his groundbreaking work in “Thinking, Fast and Slow,” and Carol Dweck, author of “Mindset,” have extensively researched human behavior. It’s essential to convey to parents that routines are deeply rooted in our neural pathways and brain plasticity. When children repeatedly engage in a task, their brains adapt, making it easier to perform that task over time.
2. The Role of Brain Chemistry:
Experts like Dr. John Ratey emphasize the role of neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin in motivation and reward. By structuring routines with achievable milestones and rewards, parents can stimulate the release of these “feel-good” neurotransmitters, motivating children to adhere to their routines.
Practical Tips for Encouraging Routine:
1. Lead by Example:
Children often emulate the behavior of their parents and mentors. Demonstrating a structured daily routine can inspire them to create their own. I encourage parents to share their daily schedules, highlighting the importance of work, play, and rest, based on my experience as a chess coach. Parents shall also share some good examples of people who the child already admires or adores and tell them that individuals’ routine and the success they managed to achieve sticking to the routine.
2. Goals, Milestones, and Triggers:
Communicate the goals and advantages of following a routine, drawing on my expertise in coaching young talents. Explain how routines can help children excel in academics, sports, or any other activities they are passionate about. Find the right trigger; we all have triggers, some of which can push us to go beyond our limits and do wonders. Each kid has their reasons for playing the game, encourage them and show them the possible bright future, boosting natural production of serotonin in their brain, an important happy hormone which we will discuss in detail in another article. With all these, it’ll help them take small steps towards their goals.
3. One step at a time:
Based on my years of coaching, I recommend that parents commence with simple routines and gradually increase complexity. Which means we can add two new habits and follow for 30 days before adding more to the mix. The human brain tries all the way to conserve energy due to evolutionary psychology and hence if it’s complex, it’ll be impossible to follow everything. Hence keep it slow but lasting. This approach allows children to build confidence and adapt without feeling overwhelmed.
4. Consistency is Key:
Stressing the importance of maintaining routine consistency is a lesson I’ve imparted to many of my students. Such habits if formed in early years can shape a child who can achieve success in any field due to the attitude and discipline that becomes first nature to them, much like army training. Although as we grow, our brain cannot adapt as easily and is not as neuroplastic. Hence I help parents understand that adhering to a schedule daily can reinforce the neural pathways associated with their child’s routine and should be done in formative years.
5. Incorporate Rewards:
Emphasizing the importance of rewards as motivators, I encourage parents to let their children choose their own small rewards for completing tasks within the routine, a strategy I’ve seen work effectively in my coaching. When you let them enjoy their rewards after following the routine, it releases dopamine, and with time, the brain adapts to dopamine release even without rewards. This is the behavior in great achievers; they feel fulfilled when they complete their tasks, irrespective of the outcome.
6. Encourage Physical Activity:
Drawing on the expertise of professionals like Dr. Wendy Suzuki, I highlight the benefits of physical activity in enhancing cognitive function. I recommend including regular exercise in the daily routine to promote brain health. I find it extremely important to have some sunlight exposure every morning and forward ambulation (walking in an open area); this makes you totally awake, sets your circadian & ultradian rhythm rightly, promotes melatonin secretion (sleep hormone) at night, high energy levels, and better focus. We will discuss this in detail soon.
7. Provide Flexibility and Getting back on track:
While routines are essential, I advocate for flexibility based on my experience as a chess coach. Children should learn to adapt to unexpected changes without feeling stressed. What I have witnessed and still struggle with is that kids come to a wonderful routine but then there is a vacation, a tournament, or some holidays, and boom, back to ZERO. Being flexible and coming back to the routine as soon as the events are over is an extremely rare occurrence, but if achieved, no one can stop you. Tips to do it can be having different routines for tournaments and home and stick to those according to the scenario.
Conclusion:
Incorporating routine into a child’s life is a powerful tool for instilling discipline and a strong work ethic. With my background as a chess coach and mentor, I understand that understanding the science behind routine formation and drawing inspiration from leading experts is crucial for effective guidance. Encourage parents to lead by example, set clear expectations, and create a positive environment where routines are seen as a pathway to success. With patience and consistency, children can develop the habits that will serve them well throughout their lives, whether in chess or any other pursuit.
If you have any questions, please reach out; I’ll be happy to answer.
AGM Chandrajeet Rajawat
CEO, Kingdom of Chess
Top Chess Academy